Alternating Christmas with in-laws
Christmas is the one date nobody wants to give up. Alternating it by year is the plan most couples reach for, and it only works when everyone can see the next eight years at once. This page covers the Christmas part only. For all the holidays together, see how to split holidays between two families.
Eve and Day, flipped every year
Christmas is two days, which makes it easy to share. One family has Christmas Eve, the other has Christmas Day, and next year they trade. Neither side misses Christmas altogether, and each gets the morning every other year. Here is the plan for 2026 to 2033, with the dates, for two families.
| Year | Christmas Eve | Christmas Day |
|---|---|---|
| 2026 | Your parentsThu Dec 24 | In-lawsFri Dec 25 |
| 2027 | In-lawsFri Dec 24 | Your parentsSat Dec 25 |
| 2028 | Your parentsSun Dec 24 | In-lawsMon Dec 25 |
| 2029 | In-lawsMon Dec 24 | Your parentsTue Dec 25 |
| 2030 | Your parentsTue Dec 24 | In-lawsWed Dec 25 |
| 2031 | In-lawsWed Dec 24 | Your parentsThu Dec 25 |
| 2032 | Your parentsFri Dec 24 | In-lawsSat Dec 25 |
| 2033 | In-lawsSat Dec 24 | Your parentsSun Dec 25 |
| Count | Christmas Eve | Christmas Day | Total |
|---|---|---|---|
| Your parents | 4 | 4 | 8 |
| In-laws | 4 | 4 | 8 |
Even: every family has the same number of each holiday over these 8 years.
Pick a handoff hour that leaves room for a long breakfast at the first home, and agree on it before the first year.
The off year
The year your parents don't get the morning is the hard one. A few things take the sting out. Move a shared meal to a nearby date, as Connected Couples suggests, so the weekend before becomes the family Christmas. Put a call or video chat on the calendar at a fixed time instead of "sometime". Send the gifts early so they open them on the day.
Write the plan down and send it to both sides; this page has wording for the call. This site keeps the plan in the link, so both families can open the same page and see every year.
When kids arrive
Fox 13's guide suggests protecting time for your own household once you have young children, by moving the extended-family gathering from Christmas morning to lunch or dinner so presents are opened at home. If you do, the plan above still works. It then covers who you eat with on the day.
Picking who goes first
Someone has to have the first Christmas Day. I'd flip a coin, or give it to the family that travels farther, because the first year sets the tone. Whoever goes second gets the next year, so the loser of the toss is not out anything over time. In the planner's Christmas split, the first family listed has Christmas Eve in the start year and the second has Christmas Day, so reorder the names to match the toss.
With a third family
Siblings, grandparents or a second household turn the swap into a three-way rotation. Each family then has Christmas Day once every three years, so any three-year span comes out even. This is Christmas Eve and Day for 2026 to 2031, two full cycles.
| Year | Christmas Eve | Christmas Day |
|---|---|---|
| 2026 | Your parentsThu Dec 24 | In-lawsFri Dec 25 |
| 2027 | In-lawsFri Dec 24 | GrandmaSat Dec 25 |
| 2028 | GrandmaSun Dec 24 | Your parentsMon Dec 25 |
| 2029 | Your parentsMon Dec 24 | In-lawsTue Dec 25 |
| 2030 | In-lawsTue Dec 24 | GrandmaWed Dec 25 |
| 2031 | GrandmaWed Dec 24 | Your parentsThu Dec 25 |
| Count | Christmas Eve | Christmas Day | Total |
|---|---|---|---|
| Your parents | 2 | 2 | 4 |
| In-laws | 2 | 2 | 4 |
| Grandma | 2 | 2 | 4 |
Even: every family has the same number of each holiday over these 6 years.
With two days and three families, one family has no Christmas date in any given year. A shared dinner on another date helps more here. Open this three-family plan in the planner and change the names.